I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
