she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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