And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize