porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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