I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
a search helicopter?!
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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