I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize