OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
