I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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