In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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