You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
A+ Viking dick
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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