Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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