This girl is more easily done than said...
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
