then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
