you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
