It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize