I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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