Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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