We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Randomize
