I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
