Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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