My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
