i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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