Only a mothe r could love this liver
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
