4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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