Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize