well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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