She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize