i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Less talking, more tequila
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
and you fell through a lawn chair
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
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