I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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