Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize