It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
