I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
