Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
