i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
I have a yeast infection.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.