glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
