I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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