Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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