she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize