Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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