Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
