love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Randomize
