New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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