Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
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