Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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