thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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