We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
