It's Friday. Sex?
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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