maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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