South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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