I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I've blown a few things in my day
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize