Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
